Agatha Christiaansdr Bisson (1824-1880)

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Enkhuizen, Netherlands (Agatha's birthplace) today

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The Netherlands, Agatha's birthplace

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Marriage of Theodorus van Raaphorst and Agatha Bisson, 1851

Story: "Theodorus and Agatha, mystery couple"

(By their great-granddaughter, Anna, with helpful research by Perplexity AI)

I know nothing about their early lives, but in Amsterdam on Christmas Eve, 1851, my great-grandparents, Agatha Bisson and Theodorus Leonardus van Raaphorst, were married.

Theodorus and Agatha lived in Amsterdam for a while and then moved back and forth several times between Amsterdam and Rotterdam. Along the way they had four children and lost two of them, one in infancy and the other in early childhood. The two who survived were my grandfather, Christiaan Frederik ("Chris"), and his younger brother, Antonius Leonardus ("Tony").

At some time between 1867 and 1871, when the boys would have been adolescents, Theodorus apparently abandoned his wife and family. He headed south and lived for most of the rest of his life in or near the Hague.

Life must have been difficult for Agatha and her two sons. In 1871, when Chris was 18 and Tony 15, they all moved in with her mother. During that same year, and before his 16th birthday, Tony enlisted in the Dutch military, possibly to reduce the family's financial burden.

Tony's army portrait

The above photo was a cherished family souvenir that my father kept all his life, but it was always my understanding that it was of his father, Chris, not his uncle Tony! It turns out that Chris was actually not eligible for military service, his being the only surviving son in his family. And I am sure the photo really is Tony; the description on his military record mentioned the birthmark on his forehead, clearly visible in the picture.

In 1873 the Netherlands declared war on the Sultanate of Aceh, in what is current-day Indonesia. Tony's military unit was called up for active duty, and he was sent to Indonesia to fight. I don't know how much communication there was between Tony and either what was left of his family unit in Amsterdam, or his father in the Hague, but I believe none of them were ever notified of his death in 1878, still fighting in Indonesia.

I only learned of his fate when I discovered his recently available military death record.

The whereabouts and fate of the brothers' father, Theodorus, also remained a family mystery for many years. However, he surfaced, in person, in about 1897, when he knocked on Chris and Elisabeth's door in Amsterdam and asked to be taken in, about 30 years after they had last seen or heard from him.

According to the family story, Theodorus flaunted an expensive-looking pocket watch, and they thought maybe he had come into money. When they discovered that the gold-plating on the watch was fake that they sent him packing. My dad was a baby at the time of the event, but he was told the story by his parents and older siblings.

I don't know how much the family was able to discover about Theodorus's "second life," but thanks, again, to the fact that records are so much more accessible than in my dad's day, I know many of the places where Theodorus lived, and even that he was married not once, but three times!

Theodorus and Jannetje's marriage record, 1899

I also know that Theodorus died in the Hague in 1907, and that his third wife outlived him by about 15 years.

I’d like to know more about Agatha and Theodorus. How did they meet? Was she as “difficult to be around” as some family members reported? Was Theodorus a “bad actor”or “black sheep,” and to be the sole blame for the family’s difficulties?

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